What the Cottonelle’s going on here? Since around July 2012 this ad about toilet paper and a small, white dog sniffing bums belonging to people, has graced our telly screens.

Why? I’m guessing it must be progress. Something new that those of us beyond pre-school age need to know. Something we should understand about the role (roll) of toilet paper. Is the commercial patronising or just a pain in the bum? The imagery of toilet paper in action, including the miracle Gripples type grippling everything in its path, is a bit hard to ignore while sipping a coffee or eating dessert in front of the telly. Ads aren’t on the progam either, so we are pretty much a captive audience.

Tough luck for a new couple having a quiet time together watching telly. Hopefully it’s not shown at the movies. Probably take the shine off a romantic mood while one or the other, or both, ponder each others grippling and flossing habits.

Leaving a little to the imagination, ‘less is more’, would be totally okay with me. Advertising wonders like this will continue though, because the bottom line is money. What a bummer. Companies need to get a Gripple on themselves and spare us this irritating nitty gritty.

This ad, though a little insulting, surprisingly has a silver lining. Having looked around for other opinions I found company for my thoughts. Some serious, some of it I’m almost ashamed to say, pretty funny. Spawned by an ad of shady integrity, imaginations have embraced Grippling one way or another. I have included the following links or just Google the ad and you’ll be off.

http://mumbrella.com.au/kimberly-clark-cottonelle-toilet-paper-introduces-gripples-for-a-cleaner-wipe-101394

http://www.smh.com.au/opinion/society-and-culture/puppy-love-gets-flushed-away-as-tv-advertising-stoops-to-a-new-low-20120907-25jwv.html

Despite Gripples apparently being the answer to my implied failures in personal hygiene, I found that without an operators manual (paper or digital), I have a few questions I’d like resolved:

* Dogs by nature, sniff each others bums and then generally pal (not Pal) around. Doesn’t that mean the person the cute white dog sniffs and then sits with, probably smells like a dogs bottom?

* At home in the real world, can this be checked using the family dog? If so, does the dog have to be white?

* For those without a qualified dog, can other pets such as cats, ferrets, snakes or goats be used?

* Can my weapon of choice be a canary? Miners world wide have for ages, used canaries in the coal mines. If it falls off its perch you know you’ve got a problem.

* If no pets are available, can a person be a substitute? What if a person lives on their own?

* Were any white dogs harmed or badly frightened in the making of this commercial?

* “I’ve heard so much about Gripples, I can’t wait to try them”. This from a yummy bride in her wedding gown? #

* “I’ve been Grippled and I loved it.” This from a pretty young thing with a come hither look in her eyes? #

# The last two are from the Kleenex-Cottonelle ad. And I thought my humour was a little off centre.

Really, they could have saved a lot of time, effort and suspect cleverness by running the following video (as seen on America’s Funniest Videos) with the following title.

Guess who didn’t use Gripples?

BBH Rating:   a  No.2/10

Word(s) for today:     pal/Pal   —  Buddy, friend, companion/Dogfood

More to come;      same blog time, same blog channel.

If you click on a pic. you’ll get a quick gallery view that’s easy on the eye.

Word for today;   Details – a closer look

More to come;    same blog time, same blog channel

I didn’t sleep well on a Tuesday night a few weeks ago, or the couple before that come to think of it, but I knew that my Mums’ bathroom taps needed some attention to make them easier for her to turn. Frazzled or not I had about an hour and a quarter run to her place and after an ordinary morning was almost looking forward to a solo, air-conditioned drive with golden oldies from radio 2NURFM. The humidity had been a killer lately and I don’t often achieve quality radio time. This combo of cool and music, I figured, would soothe my tired, irritable state. Almost seemed a plan. I selected the big D, looked straight ahead past heavy eyelids and pointing through the windscreen said quietly, ‘Make it so’.

And so it was that after driving for around 1/2 hr I began to regret that second cup of coffee. Not that it was urgent, it just became a presence, something hinting at a decision. This annoyed me a little (easy on this day) but as my fuzzy mind calculated another 3/4 hr of driving, perhaps getting stuck in traffic, stopping at the shops near my Mums to get some milk (I’ve been doing that forever I think) and other stuff like flat tyres, a breakdown, helping someone to cross a road or saving an injured Koala somewhere, a decision and solution materialised and I pulled into Sandgate Cemetery which I pass each time I travel this way.

From a previous visit I remembered a public ‘gents’ and figured I’d be okay even if I’m not a genuine customer this day.

On entering it was clear I had to drive around the ‘block’ and motored slowly. I was not in a hurry. Around halfway down one side of this block I looked right and located my intended target, mentally (and modestly) patting myself on the back for being a Clever Trevor. At this very time I also noticed that a kind of laneway, bisecting this block, presented an opportunity to arrive with even less fuss. This just kept getting better; I almost smiled.

The grassed laneway looked fine, I didn’t want to break rules or cause a fuss after all. Slowly idling along I thought I may be in a little trouble as the way narrowed and a few tree branches threatened to become a problem. But it was fine. A little touch of a leaf or two on the roof and almost home. There was no need to draw on my skills and good looks just yet.

All good things must come to an end though. In the words of Mike Nelson of Sea Hunt (played by Lloyd Bridges), “then I saw it”. At the end of this laneway, a barrier, a thinnish pole stretching horizontally from one side of tombstones to the other. My almost a smile turned into a sneer with a ‘that’d be right you mongrel’. How did I not see this? I checked didn’t I? It became apparent that an annoying reverse effort was to happen despite all the questions I had for myself. Before setting off I scanned carefully for a groundskeeper who might be hiding and snickering nearby while chalking up another victim.

The same trees were waiting and, I decided, provided spaces between to carefully turn the car round. This caused a bit more of a rustle on the roof and I realised I had picked up a bit of timber for my efforts. No worries, I’ll get it when I arrive at the gents. I muttered a Basil Fawlty or two ‘sorry, sorry’ type of sorries while to-ing and fro-ing in the trees and out of the lane just in case I drove on someone. Bit of a film day today I thought; makes a change from song titles that fit conversations. I’ve had a lot of involuntary song title trivia rattling around in my head lately which is unusual because I’m terrible when it comes to names in music.

Once aimed in the right direction I was at my destination in around 40 seconds. I didn’t notice anyone laughing and pointing as I drove past. Just as well, I would have calmly nudged them into a hole in the ground. As I got out of the car a thin branch brushed my head. Mighty thin and shiny for a branch I thought. Of course, that’s because it’s the car aerial hanging by a sliver of its original self. I still wasn’t in a hurry for the gents. I went anyway because that was why I was there with a broken car aerial. The mozzies inside were vicious.

Sometimes, with a worldly nod to myself, I agreed it’s the little things in life that matter. Traffic slowing my cemetery exit though, knew nothing of my little things as I continued to make it so.

Word(s) for today;    Videos. First one for Sea Hunt. Fast forward to 9 mins 12 secs ‘and then I saw it’. I use this saying often. The theme music for the show; like finger nails down a blackboard.

and second for Fawlty Towers. John Cleese as Basil Fawlty doing his stuff;  ’sorry, sorry, sorry’.

(To spend a penny – a saying which means going to a public toilet and sometimes having to pay)

More to come;   same blog time, same blog channel.

Two things stand out for me about this alleged sexual assault at Macquarie University.

First a young lady, the victim, must not be forgotten as the media whips up a storm on asylum seekers. Headlines highlight all asylum seekers, the Red Cross, the Immigration Department and any agency worth naming as factors to consider in the sexual assault by an asylum seeker apparently acting alone.

The victim will suffer and has to live with the effects of this indecent, cowardly assault. South African model Reeva Steenkamp, hardly rated a mention as all headlines went to her alleged killer, her boyfriend who happened to be an Olympic competitor.

This attack at Macquarie University, and it appears another separate attack following the first was attempted, highlights a security issue for students in accommodation such as that at Macquarie University, other universities or hospitals and the like. Having a few nurses in my family, I know well, some of the poorly secured accommodation for nurses in the past.

Second; Police have charged a person who is an asylum seeker. This doesn’t mean all asylum seekers are rapists. Australia has its own lowlifes as well.

What it does mean to me is this; it’s good work that the offender has been caught. If the offender is an asylum seeker and is proven guilty, then jail him for the appropriate time and on release fire him back to his homeland on the first available plane.

Hopefully there won’t be any bleeding hearts and do gooders out there who think he deserves a second chance. This behaviour goes way past ‘biting the hand that feeds you’ mentality.

http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/asylum-seeker-charged-over-university-sex-assault-20130226-2f3jz.html

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/national/2013/02/27/12/01/no-bail-for-asylum-seeker-on-sex-charge

Words for today;           Leave our women alone.

More to come;    same blog time, same blog channel.